TDSB Report Card Mishap As Teachers Unsure Which Of The 12 Graysons In Their Class Is Which

By Andrew Scott

Trinity Bellwoods - Along with Toronto’s season of summer construction comes the TDSB’s issuing of final report cards summarizing student progress, accomplishments, and highlighting areas of academic opportunity now that the 2021/2022 school year has ended. Unfortunately, multiple teachers from Parkdale Collegiate Institute, Bloor Collegiate Institute and Harbord Collegiate remain flummoxed as they are unsure which of the Graysons whom they taught this past year is which for the purposes of handing in final grades.

“I mean was it Grayson Harrison or Grayson Hudson who handed in nothing all year, allowed others to do all the work for the final group project, and asked me repeatedly if I ‘knew’ who his lawyer father was when I told him that he was failing my course at the midterm point,” wonders Grade 11 teacher Colleen Johnson. “Further, which one had a sister named Lennox, or was it Harlow, and kept prattling on about his upcoming summer at Kilcoo Camp? I mean after a while, I just couldn’t distinguish between all of them or honestly keep track.”

When asked to comment on the mishap, school administrators responded by saying that the whole fracas is much ado about nothing given the fact that since the COVID pandemic and pivot to online learning, final high school grades are now uniformly thought of as meaningless anyways by universities across the country.

 Andrew Scott is a musician and writer who lives in Toronto in a house amongst children, antiquated technology of yesteryear and many, many instruments. Instagram, writing, poetry, more poetry.