BREAKING: Rush Limbaugh Bursts Through Ceiling Of Hell To Hero’s Welcome

Dante’s Ninth Circle - After a lengthy year long battle with lung karma, conservative media icon Rush Limbaugh has finally completed his life’s mission of escaping from all the earthly gays by crashing into the centre of hell.

Limbaugh was greeted by Judas Iscariot, Brutus and Cassius and was carried by the joyful mob to Lucifer, the Prince of Darkness, himself.

Said the half-frozen Lucifer, “Welcome Rush, you’ve done well.”

Limbaugh has stated he his eagerly awaiting being joined on the frozen lake of inner hell by LRA leader Joseph Kony, who Limbaugh praised in 2011 as being “a good Christian just trying to rid the Sudan of Muslims” (yes really, google it).