Doug Ford Solves Ontario’s Healthcare Crisis By Sending Out A Nice Little “Thank You” Tweet To Nurses

By Scott Slute

Toronto - As Ontario continues their battle against the third wave of COVID-19 with a completely defunded healthcare system, Doug Ford announced his new plan to combat the virus using gratitude.

The Premier took to social media this morning and had one of his aides send out a nice little thank you message to all the nurses in the province. Ford referred to his tweet as “the biggest advancement in Canadian healthcare since Tommy Douglas.”

“Folks, I understand how difficult it is for all our frontline healthcare workers, especially after all the funding I took away from them prior to 2020,” the Premier said in a virtual press conference, “But folks, let me tell you, I really appreciate how hard our nurses are working. And like my mother always said, a thank you is worth more than 50 additional ICU beds.”

Although many Ontario nurses were hoping for more than just a thank you tweet, during times like these beggars cant’s be choosers.

“Ya sure it’s great I guess. Look I don’t really have time for this,” one nurse at Toronto’s Western Hospital told us while she cleaned a mystery fluid off her scrubs that smelt like what we imagine the inside of a lung would smell like.

Ford hinted he had even more appreciation plans for Ontario’s nurses, including a pizza party for whichever Toronto ICU has the lowest mortality rate this month.

Scott Slute is the Editor in Chief at The Toronto Harold