Toronto Landlord Evicts Tenant On the Grounds of 'Unauthorized Pet Rock'

By Dan Pearce

Riverside - The Landlord and Tenant Board have been handling a particular dispute for over a month, but local landlord Pete Peterson finally managed to make his case.

Peterson has been trying to legally force his current tenant out of the property, on the grounds that he is “not making enough”. Peterson later added to this statement, specifying that he is “not making enough noise about how rude and awful this particular tenant is. They're always throwing wild parties and using filthy language when speaking to me”, said Peterson of the tenant, who happens to be forty seven year old nun. 

Many of Peterson's claims were initially written off as baseless, until he realized that his lease specified 'no pets', and he had noticed Sister Kate owned a collection of fancy rocks, which could be considered pets. Sister Kate clarified that these rocks were healing stones and she had by no means violated the lease, but the board denied her claim on the grounds of healing stones being “kinda bullshit”.

Peterson reported that he will once again be happily exploiting this 'no pets' loophole when evicting the upstairs couple, who are both leather leash carrying members of the sub/dom community. 

Dan Pearce is a contributing writer for The Toronto Harold. Dan can be found on both Twitter and Instagram @danfromlinkedin.