Doug Ford Sets Up Patreon Page To Expedite Bribing Process

Tired of dealing with the prolonged and inefficient wine and dine process that accompanies a bribe, Doug Ford put his small business ingenuity to action and created a Patreon page for himself.

The page awards those who fund the premier with access to construction and infrastructure projects across the province. The page includes tiers of support with the top donors having exclusive access to the greenbelt. You can support the premier through one time or monthly cash donations or through donations from his wishlist. These include - Tim Hortons gift cards, The destruction of local bee hives and the silencing of CUPE members.

Doug Ford has provided assurances that this will not affect his existing partnerships and family and friends will still have exclusive access to certain projects. All donations will go directly to the premier.