Ontario Man Hopes To Get COVID Vaccine, Or At Least PS5, Before 2022

By Scott Slute

Hamilton - 25 year old Greg Norton says if he can’t receive a coronavirus vaccine by the year’s end, he hopes to at least be able to secure a new Playstation 5.

With Ontario now freshly out of COVID-19 vaccines, and having been out of next generation consoles since November, Mr Norton is praying to each and every god that he can secure at least one of them before the end of the year.

“As great as it would be to finally hug my ailing grandmother for the first time in over a year, it would be equally great to play Cyberpunk 2077 in stunning Ultra 4KHD,” Norton tells us, “After the year we’ve all had I can say with absolute certainty that both of those things would bring me an equal level of joy.”

Best Buy and Health Minister Christine Elliot tell us that Ontario can expect a fresh shipment of both vaccines and Playstations in March, however supplies will be very limited.

“This government’s goal is to have all residents of the provinces long term care homes vaccinated by April, and to provide all straight white men in Toronto, York, Windsor-Essex, and Hamilton with a new gaming console by May,” announced Minister Elliot, “Despite the many challenges we face, just know that we are all in this together.”

At the very least, if unable to secure a new gaming console or immunization from the coronavirus, residents of the province can look forward to hopefully enjoying a new Drake album in the coming months.

Scott Slute is the Editor in Chief at The Toronto Harold