Canadians Shocked To Learn Bloc Quebecois Are Actually Still Around

By Scott Slute

Ottawa - After leader of the Bloc Quebecois Party Yves-François Blanchet demanded Jagmeet Singh apologize to one of his MPs, many Canadians across the country are shocked and appalled to learn the Bloc are actually still a real party. 

“I always thought the Bloc were just one of those joke parties we learned about in Civics class, like the Rhino Party or the Libertarian Party,” University of Guelph first year student Gabriella White tells us.

The demand for an apology comes after Bloc MP Allain Therrien voted against the NDP motion to deal with systematic racism within the RCMP, prompting Singh to call Therrien a racist. Singh was then expelled from parliament after the Speaker of the House deemed Singh was just wasting everyone’s time stating things they all knew. 

“What was he going to do after he called a Bloc MP a racist? Inform us all that Green Party MP Jenica Atwin wears Tom’s All-Natural deodorant? That Andrew Scheer drinks 2 litres of whole milk everyday? We can’t afford to have Mr Singh waste our time by telling us things we already know,” said Liberal MP Maryam Monsef. 

Most Canadians were completely unsurprised to hear the news that someone from Quebec was acting racist towards a guy in a turban. However, many said they were astounded to learn the Bloc Party holds 32 seats in Federal parliament. 

“Hold the front door!”, said extremely wholesome Moose Jaw resident Gord Fillmore, “The Bloc have more seats than the NDP? Are you sure?” 

The party, who’s chief ideology is Quebec separatism, gained considerable popularity within Quebec during the 2019 election. After this week, support for the party grew all across Canada, as many residents said the party had their complete support if it meant not having to deal their shit anymore.  

Scott Slute is the Editor in Chief at The Toronto Harold