High Park Capybaras Test Negative For Corona Virus
By Scott Slute
Toronto - Staff at the High Park zoo have reported today that the infamous capybara couple Bonnie and Clyde have both tested negative for corona virus. The couple drew international attention in the summer of 2016 after escaping from the zoo, living on the lam and wreaking havoc across the city for weeks.
Staff of the zoo chose to administer the test after noticing Clyde was exhibiting what appeared to be a dry cough. Last week, news broke of a tiger at the Bronx zoo testing positive for COVID-19, so the High Park staff wasted no time in responding.
As local celebrities, it was of course very easy for the capybaras to gain access to the highly in-demand COVID-19 tests. Zookeepers also chose to administer a test to Clyde’s partner Bonnie. Although Bonnie was showing no symptoms of coronavirus, it was noted by staff that the pair of capybara’s had not been exercising proper social-distancing measures this past month.
Upon revelation the test results were negative, staff at the zoo replayed old security footage and noted Clyde had been eating hay he found on the ground moments before his dry cough fit. Experts have determined this was most likely the cause of the incident.
Vigilante capybara’s shown here with their three sons, Tyler, Derek and Steven. Clyde is seen happily playing in hay moments before choking on it.
The news is expected to come as a major relief to the capybaras, as the couple welcomed 3 beautiful sons into the zoo in 2017. Members of the staff had expressed concern on repercussions for a positive result as the couple are in constant contact with Clyde’s elderly mother Talitha, who watches the three pups on occasion. Talitha is apart of the “at-risk demographic”, not only being a senior but having also recently undergone dental surgery. All members involved were quite pleased with the negative results.
The Toronto Harold reached out for comment to the capybaras directly, however the couple only responded with a squealing bark noise.
Scott Slute is the Editor in Chief at The Toronto Harold