Retired Torontonians Excited To Stand In Excruciatingly Long Lines To See Unwatchable Films At This Year’s TIFF

By Andrew Scott

TIFF - Fresh off the announcement of this year’s programming at the annual Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF), retired Torontonians have taken to social media to announce their excitement for this year’s programming, as well as for the crowded lines and tedious ticketing processes that they are thrilled to once again have to endure.  

According to Joyce Rosenbaum, a retired Cognitive Behavioral Therapist located in Midtown, she and her partner are particularly looking forward to waiting in hours long lines for this year’s “Spotlight on Esperanto” series, a cinematic cycle of inexplicable films narrated in a rarely heard international auxiliary language.

“I think it is the sheer relatability of the festival and its content,” suggests Rosenbaum, “That gives us, like so many Torontonians, the annual thrill of frittering away a series of our September weekdays queuing up to watch erudite and incompressible films that makes TIFF such a beloved event here in the city.”

Restaurants in the area can expect these excited film-buffs to arrive 20 minutes before they open demanding a table, and insisting on a three-course dining experience to happen in under 37 minutes.

Andrew Scott is a musician and writer who lives in Toronto in a house amongst children, antiquated technology of yesteryear and many, many instruments. Instagram, writing, poetry, more poetry.