Local Man Launches Himself Into Space After Cutting Back On Starbucks And Avocado Toast

By Scott Slute

Houston - One average man has joined the currently ongoing space race after he saved up enough money by making coffee at home.

“I thought going to space was only for billionaires. Turns out I was just budgeting poorly,” 31 year old Lance Ford tells us after returning to Earth.

By not buying his $6 latte and cutting avocados out of his diet, Lance was able to save up enough money to build a rocket and go to space after just eight months.

“I hope to be an inspiration to other young people. Through hard work and better budgeting, you too can go to space just like other hard workers!”

Lance tells us that if he doesn’t waste his money on a vacation, he should be able to purchase a failing newspaper by the end of the year.

Scott Slute is the Editor in Chief at The Toronto Harold